Tuesday, November 27, 2007

I am Legend

First there was Vincent Price, star of the 1964 classic "The Last Man on Earth". This movie more than any other follows the Richard Matheson book "I am Legend" published ten years earlier. Like all movies the basic plot
was tweeked giving birth to "Omega
Man" in 1971. The sedate vampires
fought by Price are replaced with in vouge mutans for Charlton Heston to shoot up. Omega Man is obviously the inspiration for an excelent White Zombie toon.
"I Am Legend"
Yeah, when I'm in the sky - I'm too far away - Gotta kick in to feel it - Terminate another no one is my brother yeah! The sun burns on me Well, hell is home tomb - city - stone - nail me to another cross (yeah!) Pour the gasoline, yeah burn the fucker clean - Tell me who'd she coo I want her - Like a suicide flex - hit the run and hide!Tell me who'd she coo shine the body! Yeah...Omega-man say, "It's all gone away, I cannot believe it."Well I am the one a god with a gun I am Legend!! Planet - grave - hard - kill the slave - nail me to another cross (yeah!) Pour the gasoline, yeah burn the fucker clean, Tell me who'd she coo I want her - Like a suicide flex - hit the run and hideTell me who'd she coo shine the body- vampire sharpshooter "O" I said, "A messenger for the damned" - I got a holy gun - come a loaded to kill everything that I am. Well I am the only nitty-grittyride a rail and look at the crime - yeah! well I am the only (god?) one they can - find. Pour the gasoline, yeah burn the fucker clean - Tell me who'd she coo I want her- Like a suicide flex - hit the run and hide! Tell me who'd she coo shine the body - yeah!

As everything following this specific genre has kicked ass one can only assume Will Smith live up to expectations and deliver his usual stellar preformance to "I am Legend" the 2007 version.





Thursday, November 22, 2007

A Thanksgiving Tale

Defeated, the leviathan drifted aimlessly through deep space. Frozen shards of carbon and water encased her once powerful wings, only her mind is aware of the dim yellow star into whose gravity well she now sink. Months pass into years as she draws closer to the star, not unlike the one from whence she was exiled. The outer rim was to be her tomb for eternity; but for a rough comet she would still gaze onto her own distant sun. Eons in space had failed to freeze her radioactive core, only time would end her; her antagonizes were all to aware of this. In victory the featherless apes had lured her from her planets warming shell of air. They had used her rage against her! Murderers, destroyers of her offspring! Vengeance, the only impulse that remained. Shards melt from her wings, a trail of dust mirrors her wrath. Her mind speaks only of revenge. A small blue green orb catches her attention, an orb like her own. The madness begins to overwhelm her reason, vengeance, these are those who imprisoned us . They would not expect her return. Overwhelmed by his good fortune, Tye wore his heart on his sleeve this day. Not only was he included on Earths first manned deep space mission, he was to lead it. Eleven other astronauts of varying scientific background would test the limits of the new ion pulse drive on the trip to Jupiter and back; a journey that would be accomplished in a mere two months. Not since the first manned voyage to Mars had tensions run so high. The ion pulse drive would allow humankind to do more than plant a flag on the Red planet, it marked the beginning of interplanetary colonization. Launch date for the Enterprise was knowingly scheduled for October 15, to avoid any interference from the passing of Comet Plymouth. Never again would ISEA (International Space Exploration Association) allow online voters the choose the name of a ship. "Systems check, Scotty, how do those engines look?" Chief Engineer Suvra softly sighed as she checked the readings of the ion-pulse drive. "Everything is go here Jon and can we please stop with the Star Trek jokes." Laughing Jon looked to Commanded Tye, "Just trying to relieve the pressure Sir." "Yes Jon, your levity is appreciated. Now prepare for separation from the station, lets see what this heap of bolts can do." "Sir?" "Levity Jon." The Enterprise sped steadily toward the Moon in preparation to use its gravity to sling-shot them toward deep space where the pulse drive would be fully engaged. In under two weeks time They would enter orbit around Jupiter for the study of her many moons. For the past twelve years Carl had been waiting for some recognition of his discovery. An unexpected comet that would pass between the Moon and the Earth. At last, mere weeks before its arrival he would begin doing rounds as the medias waning interest in the Enterprise mission sought fresh meat. "Yes, it will be the show of a life time. The dust from the comets tail will be a meteor show no one will be able to miss. The night skies will be alight." Always the same question and answers. Carl found himself wishing he had never discovered Plymouth. One would think they might inquire into the years of study necessary to calculate the precise arrival of Plymouth, the hours in the observatory, along, staring into the void. The fact that it would pass closest to Earth on the third Thursday of November delighted them. They seemed to think it was so easy, that math involved would have melted their soulless eyes in their sockets. Carl sighed, rubbing the anger from his brow he lamented himself to his role as a circus clown for these mindless automatons masquerading as purveyors of information. "As if." He said to the empty room. "This is the dog and pony show I felt deprived of upon my discovery of Plymouth. Should have named it more fashionably." Alas, thought Carl, my first calculations showed Plymouth Rock was going to land on us, that would have made the joke work. Near miss my ass. The ice casings around her wings were weakening as she approached the blue-green orb. One great effort to spread them, another would shake loose the ice and propel her into the atmosphere. Like a dying angel she fell towards the surface, turning her gargantuan form around in mid air she spread her wings gathering the air until it exploded with thunder about her great form. A billion eyes wached in amazment quickly turned to fear, then terror. She hear their screams and laughed. Vengence shal be mine.



Flying machines, similar yet some how different filled the sky around Turkey-zilla. She casually crushed one in her mighty beak, breaking through the metal shell, savoring the sweet blood of those crushed within. The ground below her began to wail as fallout shelter sirens sounded. Behind her the sky burst into flame as the remains of her tomb burnt upon the Earths atmosphere. Below, dumbfounded, her victims looked to the sky in horror. "It's Armageddon!" some screamed. The more rational trying to calm their brethren while pondering this unfamiliar phenomenon. The narration Carl had been giving to a national news syndicate abruptly refocused electronic eyes.
The reporter quickly turned to Carl for an explanation. Looking directly into the camera, Carl laughingly said, "It appears Plymouth has landed in us." Still smiling Carl said, "Get it?"
Turk-zilla swooped low over the fleeing crowds breathing a toxic cloud of weapons grad tryptophan; below people fell into an eternal slumber. The armies of the world slowly recovered from their initial disbelief and released their arsenals upon Turk-zilla. Nothing seemed able to knock her from the sky as she lazily circled the globe breathing her toxic fumes.
In desperation the ISEA sent a message to Enterprise appraising Tye of the situation on Earth.
"I still think it's some kind of joke." said Jon. "A giant turkey swoops down onto earth brining Armageddon on Thanksgiving Day. I suppose the Packers won as well."
"No Jon," said Tye, "this is no joke."
Suvra smirked, "The Pack has not won a T-Day game since 2019." A general chuckle ran through the group.
"So Captain, what are our orders?"
"We return to Earth. This turkey takes special pleasure in attacking our flying machines. It's ground controls hope we can lure it out of Earths atmosphere and hopefully follow us into the sun where it will be sucked into the gravity well and destroyed."
Within minutes the Enterprise heads off on its new trajectory to Earth. Two long weeks pass on Earth. Turk-zilla prepares a nest for her eggs atop Mount Fuji. Having received information regarding Turk-zilla where about the Enterprise takes up position in a low earth orbit above Mt. Fuji.
"Has it taken the bait?" asked Suvra the Captain.
" Not yet. Jon bring us in as close as you can and increase our output of ion radiation."
Turk-zilla sees them, she remembers. Leaping from the mountain top she screams toward this new threat.
"We got her!" yelled Tye "Punch the engines to full power."
Turk-zilla blindly pursues them into the sun.
The End

Wednesday, November 7, 2007

Monday, November 5, 2007